When thinking of getting married most think of those rom-com movies where two people meet, fall in love, and get married. This is far from reality. Falling in love takes time and that starts with getting to know a person that you might marry one day. The concept of arranged marriage might sound too outdated or old school, but some people prefer this as well. They can meet their potential partners via their friends or family, and they can get to know each other and decide if they want to get married to each other.
If you are one of those people who is going to meet someone for an arranged marriage then you must be nervous. Marriages are scary anyway but the fear of getting married to someone you barely know is also something you would struggle to cope with. Although the meeting would be a make it or break it deal as you can know a lot about that person just by asking the right questions.
Since the meeting is all about you two getting to know each other better and seeing if you would like to marry each other someday. Asking the right questions about various things would make this process easier. As we have stated later, getting to know a person can be hard and that too on the first meeting seems like an impossible task. But your goal would be if you two have some common ground to make this work and if you two would be on the same page throughout your lives.
There might be millions of questions in your mind right now but first, you will need to ask the questions that matter the most. So here are some of the best questions to ask in arranging a marriage meeting, have a look:
- 1 Best Questions To Ask In Arrange Marriage Meeting
- 1.1 1. What Are Your Financial Goals and How Can We Try to Reach Them?
- 1.2 2. Do You Want Children and What Would We Do if We Struggle to Get Pregnant?
- 1.3 3. What Are Your Expectations Around Childcare and Parenting?
- 1.4 4. What is your religious faith and how strongly do you feel about them?
- 1.5 5. How Can I Help When You are Stressed?
- 1.6 6. What’s Your Communication Style?
- 1.7 7. What Are Your Deal-Breakers?
- 1.8 8. How Much Alone Time Do You Need?
- 1.9 9. Each Other’s Biggest Fear?
- 1.10 10. What are Your Dreams?
- 1.11 11. What Kind of Relationship Do You Want to Have with Your In-Laws?
- 1.12 12. What Marriage is According to You?
- 1.13 13. Talk About Physical Intimacy and Sex Life.
- 1.14 Conclusion
Best Questions To Ask In Arrange Marriage Meeting
1. What Are Your Financial Goals and How Can We Try to Reach Them?Studies say that the most common reason behind most divorces around the world is money! So it makes sense that you ask them about the financial situations and how you guys would handle your finances.This is a nice way to ask about their finances and see if you two are on the same page. If you are someone who doesn’t spend on unnecessary stuff and believes in saving, then your partner should understand that as well. On the other hand, you can also ask about their debts and their expenses to get an idea of how it is for them and if it would be okay with you in the future.This can prevent so many conflicts that might happen in the future. Besides, it’s better to discuss money before you get serious.
2. Do You Want Children and What Would We Do if We Struggle to Get Pregnant?Kids are also one of the most crucial parts of people and so if you want to know whether you guys want to get married or not, you might want to be on the same page on kids as well.You should know whether they want kids someday or not, and if they do, how many kids it would be (this might not be that important). Apart from this, you should also know how you guys will deal if you can’t get pregnant. What options you will be comfortable with the most, whether it’s IVF, surrogacy, or adoption.Struggling to get pregnant can be a hard time and a true test of your relationship at some point as well. So you might want to know how they would handle it when you cross that bridge.
3. What Are Your Expectations Around Childcare and Parenting?Since you are talking about kids, you must also discuss parenting and childcare. It is important that parents are on the same page and they do understand each other while parenting. Everyone has their parenting style that might be affected by how they grew up or what they believe is the right kind of parenting.So you should know what kind of parenting style you guys would follow and what childcare looks like to them. You should also discuss your work and life balance as well as the duties of one another when you become parents.
4. What is your religious faith and how strongly do you feel about them?Religion is also a big part of our lives, whether we are religious or not. We must understand our partners’ faiths and beliefs before we get married to understand them better.If you are an atheist and they feel too strongly about their religion then it may be a problem in the future. It is also important to understand their faith if the religion is foreign to you or the marriage is intercultural. Understand what their idea of religion is and if you are on the same page.
5. How Can I Help When You are Stressed?Stress is also an important part of all of our lives and we can’t avoid it. It is crucial to know how a person would be under pressure or when they are stressed and what they would want. Whether they would like to be left alone or they would want to talk about it is also something you should know.It is more about knowing how you can help them deal with day-to-day stress or something big that happens in our lives.
6. What’s Your Communication Style?How strong your relationship is will depend on how you two communicate with each other. This is why it is important to know how they communicate and how well you can communicate as well. If you are good at communication while they struggle with it, then you can help them. On the other hand, if they speak before they think, one can convey their feelings better in writing, or they just need some time to think about what they want to say, everything is acceptable as long as you two can handle these things and are prepared to handle each other’s communication style. So don’t neglect this.
7. What Are Your Deal-Breakers?Everyone has a deal-breaker and we have to deal with that as well. These can be the traditional issues such as their religion, kids, finances, etc, or something small like being food. While some things can be mended and worked on, others would be an absolute no for either of you.So it would be better if you know each other’s deal-breaker before committing and respect each other’s boundaries as well when it comes to that.
8. How Much Alone Time Do You Need?Alone time is crucial to all of us. Some might need less alone time while others would want it even more. This is why it is important to know how much alone time your partner needs and if that would be okay with you and vice versa.If you don’t understand the need for alone time, you might think your partner is angry or resentful for some reason, and this might lead to misunderstandings. So it is important to each other’s need for alone time and how you will be handling it
9. Each Other’s Biggest Fear?Another thing that you would like to know about each other would be fear. We all have something that we fear the most and when it comes to our partners it is better to know about those fears before we move forward. You don’t want to deal with the anxiety and stress that might come later when you don’t even know what is causing all this to your partner.This question will also tell you a lot about their personality and how they feel about certain things.
10. What are Your Dreams?It is also an important question to ask as you would know what their dreams are and what they are passionate about. You two can talk about your dreams and see if that is going to work for each of you. How much you can support them in achieving their dream and vice versa is also something to think and talk about.
11. What Kind of Relationship Do You Want to Have with Your In-Laws?How they are going to be with your family is also an important aspect of marriage that you don’t want to ignore. You should also be clear about your relationships with your family and how you would like them to be around them. Whether you are from a close family or have lived your life independently is something that you don’t want to ignore. This can affect your relationship in the future, so talk it out.
12. What Marriage is According to You?This is also an important question to ask. Everyone has some expectations when it comes to marriage and how they want it to be. You must meet those expectations (at least half of those) to live a happy married life.See if they want a lot of date nights, parties, celebrations, or they just focus on the little things or both. You should also tell them your expectations from your married life and see if they can fulfill them and vice versa.
13. Talk About Physical Intimacy and Sex Life.Last but not the least, your sex life is also important and you should talk about it as well. This doesn’t have to be on your first meeting or the first time you talk, but make sure you find a way to understand each other’s intimate needs and wants and see if you can fulfill them.
ConclusionSo these are some of the questions that you need to ask your potential life partner. As we have said you can also ask the questions that are important to you, but these questions are a must to figure out if you two would be on the same page. The answers to these questions would certainly give you an idea about how the other person is and whether or not they would be a right fit for you.That would be all for now and we hope you liked our article and found it helpful. Stay tuned for more such helpful content in the future as well.